He was a violent
and self-advertising politician.
1781, Nov. 17, Saturday night.--I do not know how I shall conclude
my letter, but I begin it in no better spirits than I can have, when
I reflect, as I can never help doing, upon a loss which I sustained
this day; it is now thirty years, and which as many more, although
they will certainly annihilate the reflection of, can never repair.
I will not be so unjust to the kindness which I have received from
you and some others as to say that when I lost my father I lost the
only friend I could have, but I most undoubtedly lost the best, and
being to-day where that happened, and more at leisure to recollect
it, je la sens, cette perte, avec la meme vivacite aujourd'hui, que
je ne l'eusse faite que depuis trots jours.
I set my heart therefore particularly on receiving to-day a letter
from you, et la 'voici. It is a great consolation to me, as that it
proves to me, with manifold other arguments, that whatever may be
your occupation, you will find a moment to tell me, what if you did
not I should have not the least doubt of, and that neither business
or distance will deprive me of the place which I have always
maintained in your mind and regard.
But mes jeremiades ne sont pas encore finies. The Castle air, by
which I find the health of the children must be in some measure
affected, and your own to be made a sacrifice to I do not know what,
is to me a great grievance, and one to which I know as yet no
remedy.
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