But, Cob,
What entertainment had they? I am sure
My sister and my wife would bid them welcome, ha?
COB. Like enough: yet I heard not a word of welcome.
THO. No, their lips were seal'd with kisses, and the voice
Drown'd in a flood of joy at their arrival,
Had lost her motion, state, and faculty.
Cob, which of them was't that first kiss'd my wife?
(My sister, I should say,) my wife, alas,
I fear not her: ha? who was it, say'st thou?
COB. By my troth, sir, will you have the truth of it?
THO. Oh ay, good Cob: I pray thee.
COB. God's my judge, I saw nobody to be kiss'd, unless
they would have kiss'd the post in the middle of the
warehouse; for there I left them all, at their tobacco,
with a pox.
THO. How? were they not gone in then ere thou cam'st?
COB. Oh no, sir.
THO. Spite of the devil, what do I stay here then?
Cob, follow me.
[EXIT THO.]
COB. Nay, soft and fair, I have eggs on the spit; I cannot
go yet sir: now am I for some divers reasons hammering,
hammering revenge: oh, for three or four gallons of vinegar,
to sharpen my wits: Revenge, vinegar revenge, russet revenge;
nay, an he had not lien in my house, 'twould never have
grieved me; but being my guest, one that I'll be sworn my
wife has lent him her smock off her back, while his own shirt
has been at washing: pawned her neckerchers for clean bands
for him: sold almost all my platters to buy him tobacco;
and yet to see an ingratitude wretch strike his host;
well, I hope to raise up an host of furies for't: here
comes M.
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