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Bangs, John Kendrick, 1862-1922

"The Bicyclers and Three Other Farces"


Yardsley. Oh no; not too kind, Miss Andrews. Barlow simply realizes
that one who has proposed marriage to young girls as frequently as he
has knows how the thing is done, and he wishes to give me the benefit
of his experience. (Aside.) That's a facer for Barlow.
Barlow. Ha, ha, ha! Another joke, I suppose. You see, my dear Bob,
that I am duly appreciative. I laugh. Ha, ha, ha! But I must say I
laugh with some uncertainty. I don't know whether you intended that
for a joke or for a staggerer. You should provide your conversation
with a series of printed instructions for the listener. Get a lot of
cards, and have printed on one, "Please laugh"; on another, "Please
stagger"; on another, "Kindly appear confused." Then when you mean
to be jocose hand over the laughter card, and so on. Shall I
stagger?
Dorothy. I think that Mr. Yardsley meant that for a joke. Didn't
you, Mr. Yardsley?
Yardsley. Why, certainly. Of course. I don't really believe Barlow
ever had sand enough to propose to any one. Did you, Jack?
Barlow (indignant). Well, I rather think I have.
Dorothy.


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