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Bangs, John Kendrick, 1862-1922

"The Bicyclers and Three Other Farces"


Only worry her if I asked her for it--won't hurt him to suffer a
week.
Enter Bradley.
Bradley. Has she come yet?
Yardsley. No--just gone up-stairs for a shawl-strap.
Bradley. Shawl-strap? Who?
Perkins (outside). Hurry up with that Pond's Extract, will you?
Yardsley. All right--coming. Who? Who what?
Bradley. Who has gone up-stairs after shawl-strap--my wife?
Yardsley. No, no, no. Hasn't she got here yet? It's Mrs. Perkins.
Perk fell off just now and broke in two. We want to fasten him
together.
Barlow (outside). Bring out that pump. His wheel's flabby.
Enter Mrs. Perkins with shawl-strap.
Mrs. Perkins. Here it is. What did I hear about Pond's Extract?
Didn't somebody call for it?
Yardsley. No--oh no--not a bit of it! What you heard was shawl-
strap--sounds like extract--very much like it. In fact--
Bradley. But you did say you wanted--
Yardsley (aside to Bradley). Shut up! Thaddeus banged his ankle,
but he'll get over it in a minute. She'd only worry. The best
bicyclers in the world are all the time falling off, taking headers,
and banging their ankles.


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