The learned historian, Monsieur Alcofribas, who preserves
for our instruction "the heroic deeds and prowesses" of the great king of
the Dipsodes, tells us how that once, when Philip of Macedon threatened
Corinth, the virtuous inhabitants of that city were thrown into mortal
fear; but they were not too much paralyzed to forget the necessity of
defence; and while some fortified the walls, others sharpened spears, and
others again carried the baskets, the noble Diogenes, who was doubtless the
chief literary man of the place, was observed to thwack and bang his tub
with unmerciful vehemence. When he was asked why he did so, he replied,
that it was for the purpose of showing that he was not a mere slug and lazy
spectator, in a crowd so fervently exercised. In these times, therefore,
when Philip of Macedon is not precisely thundering at our walls, but
nibbling at every man's cupboard and cheese-press, it behooves each
Diogenes to rattle his tub at least, in order to prove, in the spirit of
his prototype and master,
"Though he be rid of fear,
He is not void of care."
If the noise he makes only add to the general turbulence and confusion, the
show of sympathy will at least go for something.
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